awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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