with your own penis?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
