And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
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