so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
