just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Did you pee in the oven last night??
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
