I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize