Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
two words...techno handjob
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize