I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
