kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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