and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
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