i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
