he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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