No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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