It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
