I want to stick my p in your. b.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
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Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
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Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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