I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
