A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
