You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize