i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
