All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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