yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
