Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
