Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
