as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
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