So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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