nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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