hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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