It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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