You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
