Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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