Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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