so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
