I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
