If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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