i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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