He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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