she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
