i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
