one might say we're banned from that church
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
