There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
