Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
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