one word: firstdatebathroomanal
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
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