id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
