Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
