I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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