Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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