She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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