He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
how drunk are you?
Several
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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