Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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