Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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